My Secret Life


If it’s not on social media, it didn’t happen right? Wrong. I have been going through a revolution of sorts when it comes to social media and how much I want to share. I’ve been so torn. I want to grow my business and interact but I also want to protect my privacy and the people I share my life with. I chose to put myself out there publicly for my blog & planner business but my friends and family didn’t. How can I build an authentic following if I also want to live guarded? How do I snap moments to share but also live in the moment with the ones I love?

These are questions that honestly have kept me up at night over the last few months. I had been pulling away from sharing things as they were happening for safety and felt like my memories were being cheapened when I spent too much time making sure I had snapped an insta-worthy photo instead of making memories. My husband and family aren’t big on social media. They support my businesses and goals wholeheartedly but are not big fans of having their faces, homes and voices on the Internet. 

In the midst of this struggle, Jared and I took a vacation day in the middle of the week (we literally never do this) and spent the day doing something we’d been wanting to since we got married and just never allowed ourselves the time for. We put our phone in a secure place and spent the rest of the day laughing, playing and just enjoying hanging out together. That day changed my life. I felt more connected to my husband than I had in way too long, I genuinely smiled all day long and felt more “me” than I had in years. 

When we headed home that day, I told Jared just how much that day had meant to me. That I wanted so many more days and memories like that. Just us. No technology, no distractions, no constantly feeling like I had to document each moment. That day was a gift to both of us. I finally received clarity on how I wanted to manage having a business highly dependent on social media, he had his undistracted, easy going (or my high strung version of it anyway) and relaxed and happy wife back, and we made memories that day that I will remember forever. 

I snapped a photo at the end of the day and it shows two happy, in love, sun kissed and tired spouses from a heavenly day well spent. You will never see that photo. Or photos from this past weekend when I completely unplugged again. You see I realized that day that there are some memories and some moments that are too special to share.  I feel too protective of them. Like sharing them will steal the magic from those moments. 

On the way home, I told Jared how I wanted to stop sharing so much and just take photos to use in our yearly “yearbooks” (that I’m very behind on and hope to finish this winter) or for us to remember special days by and be more selective with what I post of us and especially if we decide to have a family. The relief I saw on his face made me even more sure I was making the right decision and sad at the same time. All the constant picture taking for the blog & social media and sharing our private moments had taken a toll on my husband and our ability to enjoy our time together. I feel terribly guilty about that. He had tried to tell me this many times and I just didn’t listen. 

You have probably noticed a change in social media and blog content. You will find I’m sharing a lot more me and a lot less of my husband and family. I love this community and interacting with all of you but protecting my family and making sure I’m the best wife, daughter, sister, granddaughter and friend has to take precedence over my business. I hope you understand why I’m making this shift and if you don’t, that’s okay. The level of technology and power of social media in our generation makes this a difficult line to walk and I’m just choosing the path that works best for me. I hope you’ll stick around and enjoy some great content coming your way! I’ve been working hard behind the scenes to plot out the direction of this space and my social media presence in general and I truly think it will be better than ever. 

That day with Jared changed my life and our life together for the better. In the past month, I have made so many memories. I have taken photos of moments that mean the world without caring one bit what the world would think of them. It’s amazing how one day can change your outlook on so many things. Making this change has snowballed into me making even more changes to our day to day life that I can’t wait to share with you. I finally feel like I’m on a journey to being the best version of myself for me and for those I love.

2 comments

  1. I totally know what you mean and now that I have a daughter I'm very guarded about what I share about her. She didn't ask to be put out there...xo, Biana -BlovedBoston

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  2. Could not LOVE this post more! I have gradually switched a lot of my social feeds to being mostly blog related, and share very little about my husband and daughter but of course they have a cameo from time to time since they're such a huge part of my life. The weekends I unplug, and am just present are the best and most fulfilling <3
    Green Fashionista

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